There is a cult that has gotten a foothold on the internet. This cult is called Incels. Incel means “involuntarily celibate,” but it is a grievence group of men who believe that the system of dating is rigged, that only Chads or men with perfect looks and 401Ks can get a woman. So they decide to give up on finding anyone and become priests of inceldom, where they delight in thier misery, and use it as an excuse to give up on finding a spouse altogther.
There is a great video that does probably the best summary on this movement that I recommend watching:
Some other key words we need to explore about this sub culture is terms like Normies and Simps, Blue, Black, and Red Pills. You probably have heard these terms somewhere, I thought it was just some Generation Z colloquialisms or word use like how people use to say “That’s bad” for that’s good, but these are incel terms as well. Normies are considered people who are living normal lives, who have families, steady jobs, and live normal lives, and are seen as slaves to the rigged system, the machine, the Matrix as you will. Incels consider them the enemy, and that they taking the Blue Pill, which means they are not awake to the supposed reality of women have too much influence, and that women just manipulate and use you. Red Pill means you have become an incel, are enlightened with this philsophy that the system is corrupt, and that your biology dictates your fate romantically, and women are the worst. Black Pill is sort of a counter to the red pill, it is an attempt to modify your body and etc to become a Chad, and look great to maybe be accepted by a woman. Simps are considered the Anti-Incels because they chase after women and will jump through whatever hoops to win the fair lady, by Incel definition Courty Love and knights who use to joust trying to win the hand of lady fair in tournemants were simps. Then there is the word Cope, which means that you are trying to do therapy, grow, and actually become a person that would be compatible with a women in a long relationship and this is consider anathema by Incels.
As the Video I shared above states, Incels have made rejection their identity, or rather grievence thier identity. They believe they cannot find love, make loneliness an identity, and decide to turn their back on the world. I agree the involuntary in the title is wrong, this is a voluntary choice to become a misogynist and blame all the problems of life on women; it is misogynistic scapegoating. I understand there are real issues with Bablyon The Harlot rising, and Extreme Feminism that wants men to be treated like dogs and even removed from places of influence; in a lot of ways these radical feminists are Femincels; doing what Incels are doing to women by blaming men. But perhaps the most alarming form of Incel can be found in the Church, and so let’s examine that.
Monasticism and Asceticism both adopt celibate vows. They are religious incels in terms of relationship, but not necessarily bitter (essentially). The problem is as the Prosperity Gospel and Mega Churches have compromised Evangelicalism with its commerce, many people find themselves drifting towards Radical Christianity, which trypically is Monastic and Ascetic in style, and with Incel being a sub culture, it is very easy to make a hybrid of the two; deluding oneself into the thought, “I can be an Incel for Immanuel, do as he said, become a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven, “For there are eunuchs who have been born that way from their mother’s womb [making them incapable of consummating a marriage]; and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men [for royal service]; and there are eunuchs who have made themselves so for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. He who is able to accept this, let him accept it.” (Matthew 19:12). The problem is Jesus said in same chapter earlier, “The disciples said to Jesus, “If the relationship of a man with his wife is like this, it is better not to marry. But He said to them, “Not all men can accept this statement, but onlythose to whom [the capacity to receive] it has been given.” (Matthew 19:10-11).
The Incel mindset is in total opposition to what the LORD states, “it is not good for Man to be alone, I shall make a help mate for him,” (Genesis 2:18). Back to Asceticism which is also a major aspect of Monastic practice, is defined as, “Asceticism is the practice of rigorous self-discipline, abstinence, and self-denial of worldly pleasures—such as food, comfort, or material goods—to achieve higher spiritual, moral, or intellectual goals.” (Google). In many ways Incels can say that their absistance from romantic life is some sort of higher intellectual goal against the system, but heed the warning from the Aposle Paul, “These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh.” (Colossains 2:23, ESV). Asceticism if powerless to stop the sins of the flesh, then it is useless to achieve self discipline, pious and ideological goals.
The Devotio Moderna Movement, in specific The Imitation of Christ by Thomas A Kempis is a often how one can be brought into Incel thinking through religious means. Because it is by a Monk who has adopted celibacy, and from a time whne the Church, The Medieval Catholic Church, worshipped celibacy, voluntary celibacy, and virginity as the highest virtues. Yes, you can see how they could be complimentary to Incel sub culture which claims to be involuntarily celibate. Clearly Incels could latch on to Medieval Catholic Monasticism as a means to have religious incel circles groom you as a believer into falling into Incel crowd. Therefore, you must be very careful with Kempis and other Monastics, because their teachings do emphasize rejecting women, sex, and this world, which exactly what Incels are doing; they hate women, will not have sex with them, and the world they see has being rigged against their entitlement.
As Christians it behooves us to be aware that this toxic subculture is bleeding into many spheres of the internet. I have encountered it, I had no idea what Incel, Chads, Stacys (that is the female Chads), Red Pill, Blue Pill, Black Pill, Normies, Simps, and etc meant, I thought again this was just language of younger generations for stuff like LOL for laugh out loud or something.
You can bury the Incel mindset once and for all with these words, “God said, Let us make for ourselves Man and Women in our Image,” (Genesis 1:27). God made Woman just as much as Man in His Own Image, that means if you hate Women as an Incel, you hate God, because Woman is in the image of God! Now yes there are Radical Feminists who are Femincels who hate men, and they can exasperate you if you are a man, but you do not judge an entire gender and one half of the human species based on a minority! We have to be aware of this, because behind this Incel and FemIncel movements is the devil. God does not want you to be bitter, miserable, and proud of your misery. He wants you to have na abundant life, “The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].” (John 10:10). He wants you to meet someone to build a family with unless you are one of those few chosen to be Eunuch for the Kingdom, but that is an exception, not the rule for most humans on this Earth. The truth is that men have their minds messed up from looking at women as objects because Pornography has warped to dehumanize women into pleasure portals, rather than seeing them as the Image of God and potential partners to have deep and lasting relationships with. Women do not exist on this Earth to give Men pleasure, nor do Men exist on this Earth to give Women pleasure, they are Images of God who have purposes, intellects, spiritual callings, and so much more. Yes there is pleasure in sex, but pornography has warped that into like food for food addicts who uses it to cope with past truama or an alcoholic using alcohol to medicate past truama or chemical imbalances in their brains like ADHD or Bipolar. The link between Incels and that they have a warped sense of relationships because they are socially akward, have neurodiversity, used pornography heavily, and etc is probably some of the answers to reversing their radicalization if they would go get therapy, I highly reccomend Dr. Doug Weiss, who is an expert on how pornography warps human beings into objects, and has techniques to cure people with success rate of 90%. He is a devout Christian, so he incoperates our Faith in it.
It is paramount that you do not become caught up in Incel or Femincel/ Radical Feminism. The key is to work on yourself, to do therapy, build your spiritual life with Jesus our Lord, and keep dating, and trying! I really think its key to be deprogrammed from pornography’s rewiring of the brain which sees people as pleasure objects, especially women, who are like Anime girls there to give you your every stimulus, want, and desire. You would never want to live like that if it was reversed, being a walking penis and provider; most Incels groan about the pressure to be a good provider, even in duo income relationships, well that caricature they hate is what they are doing to women sexually. I am not saying being fiscally responsible or contributing in a relationship is bad, what I am saying is the feeling of all that matters is if you bring in lots of money is how men feel objectified just as women feel objectified regarding being a sex object; not the same feeling, no, but the one dimensional dehumanization of being just a bread winner or body to use as an amusement park has parallels because it refuses to see that we are the Images of God, we are the only species made to look like God; and that alone means we should treat each other with honor, love, and not hate one another nor objectify one another and caricature one another as problems in some internet cult of grievance. Amen.
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