Pseudo-Victimization: The Vile Viral View

 

Originally a victim was an innocent person who was assailed, harmed, and even slain in a heinous act or catrophe. Those who survived are also  victims who must endeavor to cope with their loss and the tragedy. Now there is a pseudo-victimization.  Pseudo-victims are people cling to the tragedy not because of their mourning, but because it has become their identity. They have gained greater attention and now manipulate people to show them pity and listen to their sob story for seventeenth or seven hundredth time. This victim is on the lower side of pseudo-victimization. They have a ligitament loss to lament; but they linger long beyond what is healthy and turn what should have been a mourning process into a manipulative one. Then there is the pseudo-victim who finds every opportunity to play the martry. They teach their children to behave like victims. If a child is accidently hit by a soccor ball in the field or trips, it is automantically a malicious act against them and they must react like someone who just underwent a terrorist attack. These pseudo-victims find every exuse to weep and file lawsuits because of their alleged hurt.

Then there is the most extreme form of pseudo-victimization. The person who chooses to be victim. This person does not simply experience a traumatic event or interpret everything hyper sensitively; they decide that they are victim in their soul. These type of people are alcoholics, drug addicts, and any other type of person who has a debilitating obsession with any substance that is harmful. These pseudo-people blame their families, friends, and even God for their problems. They behave like monsters and claim that they are victims of those who are cruel and claim they need a drink or drug to escape their oppression. The truth is that these people are cowards. Do not mistake my words, I believe addiction is a serious problem and that people do need help; but it is cowardice that someone would blame others for their problems and then medicate and claim the fallout to be any other than their own choices.

I just read on yahoo that Miley Cyrus might be a victim of having been childhood star. Really? You are going to blame all his vices and vile behavior on her father or because she was in front of a camera at a young age?! What happen to people owning their behavior? Ms. Cyrus is who she is because of her choices. Yes, I am sure being exposed to the media at young age did have some effect, but ultimately she has made her mistakes on her own. Ms. Cyrus before Christ shall be solely responsible for her actions. The logic of today's blame game is that anything except yourself is responsible for your messed up life. We are taught that when in doubt, blame your parents or your friends and especially those in authority. However, this misses the point that no one even forced you to overeat, to drink, or do depraved things. Granted influences were there that convinced you or tempted you to make bad choices; but you alone dug in, drank deep, and lived in debauchery. You cannot make everyone else your escape goat for your irresponsibility.

Make no mistake, I am not demeaning those who had a hard upbringing or who were exposed to evil things that would have an effect on anyone. However, I would pose that despite the devilish deeds done against someone, they still can turn their life around and not let the demons define their future. An example is Tyler Perry. I am not fan of his films, but Tyler Perry is a Christian and his upbringing sounds like a horror story. At a young age he was beaten by his father until he was almost dead, molested by a family member, and mistreated throughout his youth and yet Perry believed God was with him and instead of taking those deporable experiences and becoming vindictive and vengeful; he decided to live a life after the Lord. Tyler Perry first play was a gospel and since then he has founded a media empire; built his own studio to make his films. Before each rehearsal or filming, Perry goes into a chapel he built at his studio and prays to the Lord. Perry could have become someone else had he blamed those wicked people. Perry could have become like so many of troubled youth stories we hear: murdering, raping, and stealing. But instead, Perry decided to not blame those who hurt him and remain a victim, he instead chased his creativity and turned it into something positive.

We all have choice when the pressures in life surround us. We can be one of two people: Adam or David. When Adam in the Garden of Eden was confronted by God, he blamed Eve for his sin and she in turned blamed the serpent. Adam did not own that he willingly participated in the disobedience and instead blame shifted like so many of us do. In contrast, King David was confronted about his slaying his best friend to attain the object of his lust, Bathseba. The Prophet Nathan came before David and told him a parable about a man who had a thousand sheep taking the one sheep that poor man had. David told Nathan that the man who stole the poor man's sheep should be slain. The Prophet Nathan told David that the thief was  David himself. David being convicted in his heart began to weep and admitted it was true and that he was guilty. Between these two men we see a difference of heart. One shifts his blame to another, while the other takes ownership of his part in the folly. Adam is acting like the celebs today who blame their environment or some person who dragged them into deep transgression. David on the other hand is what God loves, a person who is penitent and repentant of his sin. A person who takes responsibility for his actions and admits wrongdoing.

In this day and age we must make a choice. Will we be pseudo-victims who blame everyone around us and the environment or will we choose to own our misdeeds and ask the merciful God, Jesus Christ, to forgive us. Remember, that despite his flaws, David was a man after God's own heart. David was honest man, who when he was confronted told the truth and repentant. The Lord looks for "a broken and contrite heart," (Psalm 51:17), not excuses and blame shifting. What would our world look like if our leaders, celebrities, and those in the spotlight owned their sins and asked for forgiveness? What if the pseudo-victimization ended and people got back to justice instead of justification. It is time for a change of heart and only Christ Jesus & The Holy Spirit can bring the conviction and contrition that is necessary to change a culture. Let us pray, but let us also act. Try owning your mistakes and if you should be innocent victim, lament and do not let it become a stumbling block. Do not let devilish deeds define you, but let the Lord heal you and help you get through your ordeal.